Thursday, September 22, 2005

No Direction Home

"I was born very far from where I was supposed to be so I've always been on my way home."

Bob Dylan

No Direction Home is Martin Scorsese's recently released film biography of Bob Dylan. Highly recommended.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

The Playthings of Meaninglessness

I read Crime and Punishment this summer. It's a great book. I mention this because it is not related to poker.

If you don't play for a living it is all new and fun, but professional poker players can find themselves stuck in that movie Groundhog's Day. When they are not reading the same poker book they've been reading forever they sit at the same table with the same people and eat the same meals and drink the same drinks and say the same things while being dealt the same cards, which they play the same exact way, and then they go home and wake up and do it again.

What I don't understand is the people who play every day out of choice and not necessity. There is a group of wealthy retirees who convene in the afternoons and play a Hi/Lo game at a local casino. They have nothing to do so they play poker. They have nothing of interest to talk about, but they talk anyway. Listening to this septuagenarian cluster of dullards is like being tortured with a slow, sporadic assault of ping pong balls. They rarely raise before the flop and after the flop they usually check their hands down without even betting. If one of them happens to bet he will show his cards to ensure his buddy that he was not bluffing him, as if this is the way gentlemen are supposed to play poker. Someone once stood up in disgust and said, "This is like watching old men die," and left.

I read somewhere of a suggestion for a poker doll. You could pull a string for the appropriate situation, such as the time two players end up splitting a pot with the exact same cards and one of them invariably says, "You play that shit?" I've heard this same comment countless times. It would be nice to be able to pull out that doll and yank the cord at the right moment. "You play that shit?"

A wise man once said there are two roads in life. One leads to immediate extinction. The other is excrutiatingly painful and long.

Pray that you choose wisely.